I thought I had found my dream job when I finally escaped the throes of retail hell back in November. Sadly, I ended up much worse for the wear, as I was working with a fucking psychopathic, late-to-the-game transgender woman, who was addicted to drugs. Making the situation even worse, was my asshole licking, douche bag coworker that literally made me want to strangle him every time he opened his mouth. I've never seen such an ass-kisser in my entire life.... and I worked for Abercrombie and Fitch.
If you have ever worked with an all-female team of managers, and they're all PMS-ing at the same time and you think THAT is bad, try working for a a male to female transgender woman, who is on hormones and taking a combination of recreational drugs for three days straight every weekend.
My boss gave me ecstasy pills as part of my severance package. I'm not really sure who the fuck does that, but by me telling you this, maybe you can begin to understand the gravity of my situation.
I went into this job with an open mind. Like, how cool and progressive was it that I was working for a startup that aimed to revolutionize the industry, and my boss was a transgender woman donning heels and crop tops, who openly talked about drugs? Sounds great right?
It was great, until I started realizing that she bro-ed around with my male co-workers, gave all of the exciting assignments to my male coworker (because she couldn't trust me to take care of them), and just generally disregarded my opinions, despite the fact that I was the only woman on our team (apart from her), and therefore, my opinion should have mattered even more so.
I thought it was ridiculous I was feeling this way - discriminated against by a male to female transgender woman, who clearly should have known about the struggles of discrimination and sexism. But, I wasn't wrong or alone in my beliefs, as our one, female intern ended up quitting after only a month and a half. She confided in me that she felt like my male co-worker was the only one whose opinion was being valued or adhered to in terms of decision making etc. She also said she felt like our boss didn't like her or value her opinions as a woman, or give her the same acknowledgement she was giving to our two male interns at the time.
This really resonated with me, and after she quit, I began to feel the same way, even more so, now that I was once again, the only woman on the team.
I tried to put up with it, and suck it up day after day, reasoning in my own mind "how can I possibly feel this way?" or, maybe it's all in my head. I started to feel left out, and ostracized simply for being a woman.
My boss also failed to keep me in the loop or have one-on-one feedback sessions with me. Instead, she regularly conferred with my male counterpart, and would spend chunks of the day shut in her office with him. He started ass-kissing even more, and made it a point to go to parties with her, and buy Further Future festival tickets too so he could schmooze with her there. Dude had no life outside of work, and is one of the worst individuals I have ever met. He would regularly talk about artists being "hot," and when we initially had interns applying, he said that he wished "one of them would be a hot chick." Um, the last thing I knew, this was a place of work, not a fucking dating service.... I guess I should forgive him though, because he probably hadn't been laid in like a year, since he was such a dick, and I don't know any girl who would fuck with that.
Our boss was a total deviant, making us spend an entire chunk of one of our work days to all sit on our cell phones so we could obtain the coveted Burning Man tickets she so desperately wanted. Cause, you know, a festival like Burning Man (http://burningman.org) where everyone is fucked up on drugs and running around the dessert naked for 10 days, is essential networking for the further growth of a technology based startup firm!
We were late getting paid pretty much all but two pay periods that I worked there. I can tell you, being paid late truly made me miss working for a corporate company and a company with HR. With all of the crap I put up with at my retail job, at least we were always paid on time, and if I was being treated unfairly, I could report it to HR, and I know I wouldn't lose my job for doing so. It was highly inconvenient to be paid late, and now in retrospect, I can assume (and accurately so), that we were late getting paid because our immature, party-monster of a boss, was spending company money on festival tickets, partying every weekend, and drugs (I watched her take 4 different drugs in one day once).
The day that I got "let go," We were a full week late being paid. My drug addled boss never came into the office before noon. Most days she came in around 1:30pm. We were supposed to be paid Friday, the 15th. I figured that as usual, we were just a couple of days late getting paid. However, by the time the following Wednesday rolled around, and I had bills due, I was getting pissed. I messaged my boss Wednesday morning, asking when I could expect to be paid.... no answer. She came into the office and was immediately holed up in her office in "investor meetings" all afternoon. Oh, and by the way, she used to wear mini skirts and crop tops to these investor meetings - no fucking wonder no one was throwing money at her company. But, I digress....
The next day, Thursday, we still hadn't been paid. I was really furious at this point, since she outright ignored my question, and I had bills due, and our paycheck was a full week late. Once again, she wasn't at work when I came in at 10am, so I messaged her with the same question "When can we expect our paychecks to go through? Thanks!" No answer. Although, she did spew a bunch of orders on various other message channels, so I knew full well she was online and had seen my question. She finally answered with "I'll talk to you when I come in." Alrighty....
She finally came in at noon, and didn't have time to chat with me until she had chatted with two of my co-workers, behind her office door. Finally, her door opened and I went into her office. I once again started the conversation with "Hey, I was just really wondering when we can expect to get paid... " when she told me to sit down.
She went onto explain that she hadn't even done payroll yet and didn't know when she would be able to because there was literally no one whatsoever in the company bank account. Then, she followed that up by saying she was going to have to "let me go" because she couldn't afford to "keep [me] on the team."
At this point I was irate. Her telling me she had to 'let me go' actually was a less pressing matter than when I was going to be compensated for the last three weeks worth of work at this wretched, sinking startup run by an egomaniac party monster.
I started crying and laughing at the same time as the shock set in. How the fuck did I end up working at this joke of an institution? How the fuck was I getting "let go"? and how the fuck had I not been paid yet? I think I actually kept saying "what the fuck?!" as she was speaking and "I can't believe this."
I basically told her I wasn't leaving until I had been compensated for the last few weeks, and she decided she would take cash out of her own account to give me. She told me that she wasn't going to be able to afford to pay the others until an investor put cash into the company account, and I held my tongue since I wanted to tell her that dressing in a dick-grazing, leather mini skirt and crop top probably didn't do much to help the investor situation.
I also confronted her for not telling us in advance that she couldn't afford to pay us on time. Having a warning really would have helped since I carelessly blew most of my tax return since I thought I could afford to do so since I was making more money.
I took a walk outside for 30 minutes, so she had time to run to the ATM. During this time, I continued to cry. My leather purse strap slipped over my body and severely cut two of my fingers on the way down. Now I was not only walking around sobbing in broad daylight, but also profusely bleeding from my fingers and sucking on one of them to quell the blood. I was a hot mess.
I went back to the office and took my pay in the form of cold, hard cash. My boss offered up some ecstasy pills, which I willingly excepted, saying "this is the least you can do for me." I can't believe that part of my severance package was drugs. What a damn joke. For real.... un-fucking-believable.
I walked out of there feeling like a combination of shit, failure, humiliation, regret (for ever working there), anger (towards my mess of a boss, and dick-wad coworker), and also relief. Thank God I wouldn't have to deal with that shit anymore.
I don't even care if this company turns into the next Google or Instagram (although chances it will never make it that far since it's being run and operated by an egomaniac,drug-addicted mess of a human). At least I'll never have to work another day, stagnant at an office desk biting my tongue and squeezing my fists so I don't verbally or physically lash out on my asshole-eating coworker who's very facial expressions made me want to choke him out.
I walked home from work that day, in the blazing hot sun, with a puffy face (from crying), bloody fingers, and ecstasy in my purse. I somehow managed to get hit on by every grandpa, construction worker, high school student, etc. I passed. I'm not sure who hits on a woman that looks like I looked at that moment in time - someone sick in the head.
When I finally made it home, I was delirious, like crying and laughing. My WiFi decided to shit the bed as soon as I came home, and four days later, it's still not working.
I am not sure where my life is going or what's going to happen in terms of my job, and the fact that I am supposed to go to Italy at the end of this summer.
I guess it's all for the best though. I'm scared right now, not having a source of income, but also relieved that I got out of that company, even though it was not the best way to go, since I had no time to plan.
At least I have this awesome story to tell people, and know what NOT to look for in my next job.
Oh, also, the real kicker of this situation is, even though she had no money to do payroll and had to cut me to cut down on costs, when I signed onto Craigslist to start job searching again, I found this:
https://newyork.craigslist.org/mnh/med/5545431612.html
This ad was posted THREE (3) days before I was "let go." I wonder what money she plans on using to pay this position....
Furthermore, I wish the best of luck to the intern who just slaved away for the past three months thinking he was going to be hired into this position... clearly, he is not, since this is being advertised. I love it. What a fucking joke.
Oh, also, because of the stress of losing my job, I am now once again severely breaking out. This time, I fear I will need to make the leap and just go on Accutane. Sadly for me, I was paying $300 a month out of pocket for insurance (since it wasn't offered through my old job), and now I will not be able to afford insurance until I start working again. Looks like things are about to get even better in my life.
#blessed
