There was no saving this tire... we were fucked. Good thing that couple let us hop in their Uber car... although I'm sure they regretted it after I wouldn't shut up.
I'm quite positive that everyone on the bus was thoroughly intoxicated at that point and several people hopped off to assess the damage and chain smoke their cigs. A lot of people started to call cars since we worried another bus wasn't going to make it in time to get us to the concert. After about 20 minutes or so, my boyfriend and I hopped into an Uber car that another couple had called. I'm pretty sure I was terrorizing them unintentionally in my drunken state- I asked them how they met and when the woman replied 'on Match.com,' I didn't know what else to say, so I launched into this story I read in Vogue about a 65 year old woman meeting the love of her life on Match.com. I am so obnoxious when I'm drunk... Kill me.
By the time we arrived at the venue, we both had to pee in the WORST way (I'm pretty sure I had consumed about 5 vodka-seltzers by that point.... The lines for the bathroom were SO INCREDIBLY long that I decided maybe I would run across the parking lot and pee in the woods... it seemed like a really good idea at the time. I mean, there was a line of like 40 people waiting to use a Port-o-Potty....
As I approached the out limits of the parking lot, I realized that in front of the woods, was another venue of sorts... with two security guards sitting out front. I was shameless; I used all of my drunken, feminine charm, and pleaded, "I really REALLY have to use the bathroom and the lines are too long, Please Please PLEASE can I go in there?" They seemed happy to oblige and smiled and said "Sure, no problem." Good thing I was dressed like a total slut... I'm sure that helped me out in this particular situation. Upon entering the venue, I realized I had crashed a wedding reception. I walked onto a dance floor where everyone was wearing semi-formal gowns and I could see the bride across the room. I bolted for the bathroom and as I was washing my hands, saw a group consisting of bride's maids, and possibly the mother of the bride talking about where they got their nails done. I looked like trash, standing there in my leather tights, 6 inch platforms, and crop top... I felt remorseful, even in my inebriated state. I bolted back out and met up with my boyfriend and we went to find our seats.
The venue was very confusing, and the seat and aisle numbers were VERY difficult to read, especially as we were inebriated. We bounced around at least three times during the show... but we had pretty decent seats. Again, I acted the fool and was talking to all of the people around me every time we moved seats. I need a babysitter at all times... a sober babysitter who will look after me and control me, since I clearly can't control myself.
Chris Cornell, Have my babies!!! ... Nine Inch Nails, I'll have your babies too!!! JK... no babies for me. Not now... not ever.
The concert itself was amazing. It's a bit fuzzy... but amazing. The highlights for me were definitely 'Closer' and 'Black Hole Sun'. I posted numerous FB statuses regarding wanting to have Chris Cornell's babies (classy), and then decided I needed food. I left my purse and cell phone with my boyfriend and went to find food. After I realized that every little concession stand had a line of about 15 people, and the concert was still raging on and I was missing out, I said 'fuck this shit,' and went back to find my seat. HOWEVER, I couldn't find my seat. I was lost. I panicked and started to tear up. It felt like the time I was playing in the clothing racks of the department store when I was shopping with my mom and lost her. I was searching frantically, however, it's hard to find seats in the dark and in a state of drunkeness. Luckily, a nice lady who was working as an usher helped me back to my seat.
Not sure when this was taken... it kind of looks like my fall though. Perhaps my phone went off when I bit the earth and lost my make up bag, my jacket, and my fucking dignity. Either way, this photo truly captures the feel of the evening.... ;)
My boyfriend and I rode home with two of our friends who had also gone. On the way to their car, I somehow lost my make up bag. Do you even know just how fucking precious a woman's make up bag is??? The cost of makeup is ridiculous. I estimate I lost about $140 worth of makeup. I have no clue where it went since I didn't even re-apply my makeup at any point. Maybe it went flying out of my purse when I tripped and fell in the grass as I was running towards their car.. that's also when I lost the little jacket that was tied around my waist. Hey, at least I didn't lose my keys or my wallet.
Naturally, even though I was a complete mess, I wanted to keep going. We ended up going to Highline (go figure), and I got to see a few of my friends that were working. I vomited at Highline (I think in a garbage can... fucking kill me now), and then we left and went to the Brass Monkey on W. 12 street. One of my other friends wanted me to come to 1oak, but we were in no shape to get admitted their... I am quite sure I looked like shit at that point in the night. I'd been drinking all day so I probably looked prego in my crop top, and since I didn't reapply makeup once, I'm sure my zits were out in full force. However, I kept going, and I kept going HARD. As per usual, I won't and can't go into details for the purposes of discretion, but I am a true mess when I go wild.
After the Brass Monkey, we went to local dive bar on 14th. It's all a blur after we left that spot. I vaguely remember getting home and what happened after that.
When I woke up Sunday, I vomited multiple times, including my kitchen floor.... You know you're fucked when even the thought of putting water in your mouth is enough to make you vomit up bile as you lay crying on your kitchen tiles... I had the spins and was sweating profusely until about 6pm when I finally was able to manage to eat half a bag of Cheetos and drink like a gallon of Red Gatorade. The hangover cure of champions!!!! My boyfriend made me a delicious carbonara which also helped cure the hangover.
GOOD NEWS (I HOPE):
I heard back from untitled-magazine.com and they want me to go ahead and write a trial article :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D So exciting!!!!!!! I'm submitting my article on Monday, and I will post a link in my next entry. I'm so fucking excited it's unreal... I should probably be slapped. If they like my article, I get to write more... I love writing ;)
Sorry, I didn't take any selfies of my concert outfit. I was bloated and ugly that day anyhow. Why is it that my skin always decides to break out right before something social or important? I'm not sure... but it sure does kill my confidence when it happens. Furthermore, my hair was a white person's version of an Afro. You know how it do.
I have been doing a lot of cooking with my boyfriend these past few weeks. We are gearing up for that meatball video for Kickstarter. I know that I said I was going to film it come Hell or high-water this past Sunday, but my hangover was just too severe. It was debilitating.
Well, now that that concert is over, it's time to start planning some other things to look forward to and keep me motivated. Writing this article for Untitled is definitely motivation in itself- I am so happy to start writing for a site and a larger audience again. I am going to continue the search for another full-time job as well... I have to get out of my current job before I go insane. I am also planning another mini trip to Woodstock, and hopefully a larger vacation further away too!!!! God I love planning vacations and fun activities... I think that should be my job ;) I'm really good at it.
