Now that summer is back in *almost* full swing, I'm feeling significantly more hopeful and positive towards the future. After being offered yet another internship that I am forced to decline due to the fact I need to pay rent and eat, my job search has come to a minor halt due to my preoccupation with a mini get-away, planning a party, and focusing on getting healthy (more so both mentally and emotionally than physically). I'm pretty sure in my last blog, I mentioned the fact that Muse Magazine wanted to hire me as a summer editorial intern but sadly, I was forced to decline since I can't possibly work 40 unpaid hours every week and still maintain myself. Well today I woke up to find another great internship offer with a similarly awesome art/fashion/entertainment publication, Seen Heard Known. Godfuckingdammit!!!!!! Why don't I hear back from any paying jobs I apply to? Clearly people like the writing samples I send them.... what gives?! Oh well. I am still editing my book and plan on sending rough drafts of it out to friends and family soon so I can get some real feedback (I'll probably be committed/institutionalized after my family finds out how crazy I really am... ).
Speaking of crazy and my current level of sanity, I am back to a level yellow after reaching an escalated level red on Sunday. Let's just say that once again, my friends really pulled through for me and helped to keep me on track in the midst of a very major melt-down. It also helps that I got out of the city for a day and went to the North Fork of Long Island to enjoy some clean air and wine with my boyfriend. I swear to God, being in this concrete jungle for too long really makes my stress/anxiety/insanity levels sky-rocket when I don't have a means of escape....
The little beach we found at the end of the road... It was so unfortunate that it was cloudy and about 55 degrees that day. Oh well, I guess I'll just have to start planning the next vacation ;)
Croteaux Vineyards specialized in Rose wine (my summer year-round staple ;) ). YUM!!!! The place was awesome- they had a huge outdoor, stone patio with tons of seating, an indoor space in a barn on ground-level, and an indoor loft over-looking the vineyard. If we didn't have to drive back to the city, I can assure you I probably would have had to have been carried home wasted...
Thankfully for me, and everyone involved in my immediate life that otherwise has to deal with me, I am on vacation for the remainder of the week, right through until Tuesday. I am going Upstate tomorrow thru Sunday to visit my family. I cannot wait- I haven't seen my brother since Christmas and he is home from Arizona so I plan on hanging out with him and my cousin like the good ol' days of yore. Haha... they always help me stay grounded and keep me on track in regards to my weekly lapses of sanity and fickle emotions. Despite the fact that I am going Upstate though, I have taken a vow not to over-due it on the home cooking of my parents. No sir, no can do. It's a known fact that everytime I go Upstate, no matter how vigilant I say I'm going to be in regards to resisting the chip drawer, my mother's extra-fatty home cooking, and my dad's non-stop grilling, I always end up going on a three day binge. It's like a fucking three-day steak-potatoes-cheese-chips-sweets-crabcake-and lasagna bender every single time I'm home. I am on a very strict 'summer body' plan at the moment though, and I will absolutely not indulge myself no matter what my parents cook for me (my mom already told me today she is making me crab-cakes tomorrow night and my father already informed me we are going out for dinner on Saturday... I swear to God they're trying to sabotage me...). JK. I love people who feed me.
Don't mind the hipster glasses... I was obviously feeling decently attractive this day (hence why I'm even posting these narcissistic photos) and felt like playing dress-up. PS... this swimsuit makes my boobs look absolutely ginormous... not a fan.
Also, now that I've joined the rest of the world and have an iphone, I can use cool filters like this one... which makes me look incredibly tan!!!! haha. I attempted to faux-tan my body the day I took this and it ended badly with discoloration around my elbows and knees and splotches on my legs. I'm slowly becoming convinced it doesn't matter if you have the most expensive faux tanner in the world- unless you have a professional to apply it to your naked body it's nearly impossible to make look natural by yourself, which is a goddamn shame considering I'm the color of Casper naturally.
This is what I'm currently working with. I am determined not to go overboard on mozzarella and proscuitto or crab cakes and steak this week so that come next week I can have the dream-body I'm trying to get. I'm almost there... I just want to tone my bottom half a bit more. Too bad for me I can already hear the Cheetos that my mom keeps in the snack drawer at home calling my name.... "Kelsey, Kelsey! Put me in your mouth! Lick the cheese off me, chew me up and swallow me!!!!" LOL... I'm sick.
I'll end this blog by listing the things I'm looking forward to, since I like to keep it positive these days:
1. MY PARTY!!!!!!!!! I haven't thrown a good party in years. I can't wait.
2. HOME!!!!! I can't wait to see my brother and cousin and my baby (Bijou <3).
3. Soundgarden and Nine Inch Nails concert with my boyfriend in August!!!!! I can't fucking wait... Chris Cornell... yum ;)
4. Planning another mini vacation home in July. I want to go mushroom hunting!!!! lol... can you tell I don't get nearly enough time outdoors in nature these days??? It's like as soon as I was on the stretch of highway that hits Suffolk county and has woods on either side I could finally breath in deep for the first time in over a month a couple of days ago when I got out of the city.
5. Finally letting people read my book (even though I may end up with no friends, family, or being thrown into the mental asylum after they finish it... ).
