- Sometimes I wonder why I am still starving myself and putting on eyeliner every day when I am a lost cause.
Saturday, September 2, 2017
Living in NYC When You're Ugly, Undersexed, and Almost 30
I wasn't always like this - and by this I mean, "THIS" ugly. I was always ugly. Don't get me wrong. It's a sad day when you finally realize you are ugly and there is nothing that can be done about it. Weight loss, a prolonged state of anorexia to keep your unnaturally low weight maintained, a nose job, hair dye, makeup, and fashionable clothes can't even fix the state of ugly you are.
Friday, January 20, 2017
The End of an Era Part II (I Think...)
Well, Donald Trump is officially the President of the United States, and I am officially feeling old. Old and alone to be exact. Old and thin-lipped. Old and thin-lipped, but not as thin-bodied as I was just a year or so ago.
I am typing this from the toilet, where I have the heat fan on full blast, a half drank Heinekin sitting next to me (don't even ask.... we all know, I don't drink beer, but I'm in a desperate state and it's the only alcohol in the house), and I am wondering what happens next. Where do we go from here (to quote Guns n' Roses)? "Where do we go, where do we go now, where do we go
I know my life is good - I have a good life compared to a lot of people - compared to most people if we are being general. I want to establish the fact that I don't take this for granted; at least, I try not to take my life for granted most days.
I am packing up my apartment in preparation to move. Earlier in the day I was thinking about what a dark time America is entering into with our new President.... it seems unreal; but it is reality.
You know how we all think we are special? I guess it's just that internal voice - we are made to be egocentric. Well, I realized only recently I am not special.
I'm not sure why I ever thought that I was. Why do we exist? What is this world? Does anything really matter? What is real?
I'm moving to a scary neighborhood. I don't want to move. I have been here for four years. This is all I know.
I am typing this from the toilet, where I have the heat fan on full blast, a half drank Heinekin sitting next to me (don't even ask.... we all know, I don't drink beer, but I'm in a desperate state and it's the only alcohol in the house), and I am wondering what happens next. Where do we go from here (to quote Guns n' Roses)? "Where do we go, where do we go now, where do we go
I know my life is good - I have a good life compared to a lot of people - compared to most people if we are being general. I want to establish the fact that I don't take this for granted; at least, I try not to take my life for granted most days.
I am packing up my apartment in preparation to move. Earlier in the day I was thinking about what a dark time America is entering into with our new President.... it seems unreal; but it is reality.
You know how we all think we are special? I guess it's just that internal voice - we are made to be egocentric. Well, I realized only recently I am not special.
I'm not sure why I ever thought that I was. Why do we exist? What is this world? Does anything really matter? What is real?
I'm moving to a scary neighborhood. I don't want to move. I have been here for four years. This is all I know.
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